I am not talking about the monsters from Where the Wild Things Are, gothic monsters, or the ones in your dreams. The monsters I’m talking about are objects. Sounds crazy I know but hear me out.
It begins with a friend in high school who called the dryer the “Sock Monster” and I totally agree with her. You put clothes in the washer and all the socks have a mate; you put the clothes in the dryer and the socks are still in pairs; you take the clothes out of the dryer and start to sort the socks and suddenly you have socks without a mate. You go back to the laundry room and look around the room and around the washer and dryer. You retrace your steps from the laundry room and you see nothing. If you’re like me, you start a box (or pile) of socks without mates. One or two things happen next, you never find the other sock or several weeks later, the sock mysteriously shows up in a clean load of laundry. The “Sock Monster”-the dryer - has finally coughed up the missing sock. How else would you explain it?
The “Couch Monster” is the second fiend. How many times have you found stuff buried between the cushions of the couch. My spouse and I currently live in the basement of my father-in-law’s house and the couches are where all the grandchildren sit when watching movies. I have found toys, beef jerky wrappers, potato chip bags (both empty thank goodness), our cell phones, my eyeglass case, and a multitude of pens. One couch in particular really likes to swallow things and no amount of vacuuming and cleaning stops the items from disappearing. It’s a daily chore retrieving things from the “Couch Monster.”
This next monster is similar to the couch. It is the “Car Monster.” Not everyone will have this monster, but I certainly do. I’ll drop something while I am getting into the car or while I’m driving. Getting out of the car, I look under the seats, between the seats, next to the seats, in the back, and I can’t find what I dropped. Days pass and I am unable to find the missing item. Then, one day, out of the blue, I get into the car and I find the missing piece. Where has it been? It’s obviously been in the car the whole time so, why did I not see it? I know I can be blind but I cannot be that blind.
Animals even have monsters. My cat Mishka’s monster is the “Shower Monster.” I get into the shower and after a few minutes, I will notice her sitting on the bathmat through the shower door. When I am finally through with my shower, she goes crazy meowing and rubbing my leg as I am trying to dry myself. It is as if she believes that I will not get out of the shower and then, where will she be? Who will feed her or clean her litter box? “Mommy has to get out of that thing she is in”, Mishka must think. It is quiet funny.
There you have it. Monsters. You can believe me or not and Happy 4th of July.
|Mishka, "No you can't have my bug 'Mommy Moster.'"|